Desperate Reaching, Journals & Jesus


She pressed through the crowd with what little strength she had left, desperate and depleted. She had forgotten what it was like to be known for who she was instead of by the sickness that now controlled her. I get it.

I get her because I have been her. I was the woman who couldn’t carry a child. Before then, I was the nineteen-year-old with anxiety trying to pray it away and figure out how to keep everyone happy. But just like her, I refused to give up.

She was a woman active in the pursuit of healing but even that left her empty handed and flat broke. But, one empty hand reaching out was all she needed and proved she was willing to place herself on a path of healing one more time. Too weak to run ahead of him, she trailed behind that man she heard about named Jesus.

I wonder if she thought about all the bad advice and uneducated guesses of well-intentioned people, or thought about all the things she had already tried like home remedies and 3 easy steps to find the right cure to heal her inner brokenness. A huge part of me believes she left all of those empty promises behind her.

If I can just reach the hem of his garment, I will be whole again.

I don’t even need a hand to hold, or remember what an embrace feels like. 

I don’t need a glance in my direction or a word spoken to me.

I just need my hands to reach out in hope.

Here’s the story of one gutsy sick girl who refused to give up in Mark Chapter 5:

25 And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. 26 She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. 27 When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, 28 because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” 29 Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.

30 At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, “Who touched my clothes?”

31 “You see the people crowding against you,” his disciples answered, “and yet you can ask, ‘Who touched me?’ ”

32 But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it. 33 Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth. 34 He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.”


That day the sick girl got far more than healing, she got a new name and a place of belonging in the body of Christ. She was now called “daughter” with a gutsy faith that made Jesus stop in his tracks. He knew exactly who touched him and exactly what she needed. And, because she was an active participator in her healing, she trembled at his feet and told the WHOLE TRUTH. 


It’s time to get a little gutsy in the pursuit of healing, don’t you think?

I’m tired of seeing God’s girls pummeled by the enemy and listening to all the wrong voices that have left them more confused and more broken, instead of whole.

Today’s journaling prompt is simple, it’s you reaching out to take hold of Jesus and telling your whole truth.

It’s you signing up to be active in your healing because your soul is worth your attention. Everything that you do flows from it. Maybe like me, you have found yourself once again asking God to show you what lies you might be believing.


What do you need from Jesus?

Name the dead weight that you are dragging behind you.

What are the labels that have become tangled up with your identity?

Recovering broken girl, anxiety, depression, chronic illness, or chronic negativity unable to forgive yourself and others…recovering people pleaser listening to all the wrong voices.

That is not who you are, that is the place where you begin today with empty hands reaching out to Jesus as his beloved daughter.


So much love to my gutsy girls with really big faith…keep reaching for Jesus.